"When I first arrived at Narconon I wasn't a shadow of the person I have metamorphosed into now"

Nikki, one of our Graduates, says:

"When I first arrived at Narconon I wasn't a shadow of the person I have metamorphosed into now. I was taken up to withdrawals briefly while Ali and my parents arranged for me to go for a medical detox. I remember commenting on the fact that there wasn't a lift and too many stairs consequently when it was time for me to be transferred to the Priory a chap called Murphy and my father had to carry me back down those stars to the car. It wasn't a good time and I know my beloved parents were desperately unhappy and upset to see me in this state. I never want them or indeed intend them ever to see me in that state again. I came back a week later, stronger but still not the Nikki you see today.

My time in withdrawals was a strangely happy time with a never ending supply of willing helpers from downstairs helping me. I was regaled with stories of what I'd be doing on the course. This after a while made me slightly apprehensive and Shauna, ever the protective mother hen, had a lock put on the entrance to withdrawals to monitor the comings and goings.

After 10 days I came downstairs and met my first twin, Aiden, a very happy and bouncy young chap, we went through book 1 with a lot of laughter and teasing.

When I started the sauna programme I wanted to experience everything that I had read about in the books and I wasn't disappointed. I changed physically and mentally in the 26 days I was down there. I loved it.

I came out of the sauna to a new twin, Peter for the almighty objectives (book 4). This was the start of an amazing friendship that has seen us through thick and thin, everything the programme had to throw at us. I trust him implicitly and he is the best friend anyone could hope for. I am a very lucky girl indeed to have him in my life. I hope he will always be my friend.

I have found my whole programme a constant source of self revelation and I understand myself a whole lot better now, whether anyone else does or not is another matter though. I also understand a little better why I behaved as I did when I was actively drinking. I had always enjoyed a drink socially but when I started to quaff if back at home on my own and then started to hide it from others I knew I had a problem. I admitted to myself I was an alcoholic long before it became obvious to others but didn't know what to do about it as I was ashamed to admit to anyone how much I was actually drinking everyday, The problem was taken out of my hands when I became ill and had to be hospitalised. This was the start of a rollercoaster life of hospital visits, rehabs and counselling. A few months of sobriety, then the inevitable relapse. Nothing seemed to work until I came to Narconon. The worst part of it all was the loss of respect of my family, and of myself. I was a mess, but through it all they never stopped loving me and picking up the pieces. I only wish I could have loved myself a bit more. I had a wonderful upbringing and an enchanted life so nothing could have prepared my parents or my sister for what I have put them through over the past few years and for this I am truly sorry and will never stop making amends.

Between them and all the staff and students here at Narconon who have provided this amazing environment for me to blossom into the person you see before you today, I will be eternally grateful. If I could reach down inside me and pull out just a small part of all that I have learned and experienced here in the last 5 months and pass it around, it would be enough to help so many others. So many people here have contributed to my success story; I have gone through my programme with lots of laughter and happiness.

I know I have got on Matt's nerves in the course room from time to time with my uncontrollable giggling but he has been very patient with me. Sorry Matt, but also thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the support and help you have given me.

I have been content and calm for the first time in years. Since being here, I have discovered I can laugh and be joyful naturally without having to have a drink first and I am strong and healthy and I will never let anything or anyone take that away from me again ever.

Thank you to all my fellow students who have guided me through my time here and from whom I have learned so much about ever day life."
Nikki

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